that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
