This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
