I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
