You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize