college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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