We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
