i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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