I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
