Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Randomize
