Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
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