Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
meet me or not, i'm out of control
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
