Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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