Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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