I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
