Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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