you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
