I'm going to rape someone's good day.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
