Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Randomize