i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Randomize
