You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
