whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
