he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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