well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
True strength comes from lack of pants
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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