what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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