Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
