I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
