I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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