so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
All I want is dick and wine.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
