so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
We are two peas in an std pod
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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