I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize