Can Purell be used as lube?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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