Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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