So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
