The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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