you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
