Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
