Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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