I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize