This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize
