on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
