quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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