I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
