Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I think pants incapable of making pants work
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
