well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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