Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize