Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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