i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize