how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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