who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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