I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
