is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
