No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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