Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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