When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
